music, and healing, and dancing

I always love listening (or playing to) praise and worship music, but lately it's been particularly soothing and uplifting.

Usually I pick what I listen to, but God definitely picked the most appropriate songs for me a couple weeks back via our praise team at church! Look at this:

Blessed Be Your Name (by Chris & Beth Tomlin)
It Is Well With My Soul (written by Horatio Spafford in 1873 as he passed over the spot where his four daughters had perished at sea)
Indescribable (by Chris Tomlin)
Todopoderoso ("Almighty", a very popular Spanish praise song)

The first time we rehearsed these was January 22, the night I was becoming very worried about the babies and the chicken pox outbreak. Before rehearsal I was at the hospital talking to our pediatrician and pharmacist friend, and afterwards moving baby Angel from the Baby Home to a missionary family till late, but during rehearsal I was comforted by the songs (when I could keep my mind on them).

Then by the next rehearsal, I thought God was pretty clever in choosing how to "beat me over the head" with trusting His omnipotence, blessing Him in everything, and quieting my soul in Him. Messages framed in music are just...less painful!

So this morning we played these and other songs at Cochabamba International Church, and they still impacted me as I apply them in whole new ways since losing Gabriela.


Then, as I mentioned in my email to the prayer team, the song “Glory Baby” by Watermark has helped me immensely as I try to turn my thoughts from losing Gabi from our midst to being comforted by where she is now, in her eternal home. Ironically, I first heard it here while comforting Gabriela on her first really rough night of colic in October. Every time I listened to it I was impacted to the point of tears, but it never crossed my mind that it would apply to my own life so soon.

Glory Baby

We miss you everyday
Miss you in every way
But we know there's a day
When we will hold you, we will hold you
And you'll kiss our tears away
When we're home to stay
We can't wait for the day
When we will see you, we will see you
But baby let sweet Jesus hold you
‘Til mom and dad can hold you
You'll just have heaven before we do
You'll just have heaven before we do

Sweet little baby, it's hard to understand it
Cause we are hurting, we are hurting
But there is healing
And we know we're stronger people
Through the growing and in knowing
All things work together for our good
And God works his purposes
Just like he said he would
Just like he said he would


Another song that's been amazing to listen to is this one, from the CD "Take My Life" by souled out, a Scottish group. Volunteer and dear friend Elizabeth gave it to me while she was here in December. Her pastor wrote this song:


To the God Above, by James Gregory

One moment the skies are blue and everything is clear
Then storm clouds are rolling in, our God are you still here?
When all of our words fall short in trying to explain
You’re good and we turn to You, surrendering again

To the God above all circumstance
Whose ways are higher than our ways
We lift our eyes and see Your face
And run to You

We trust in Your majesty, Your good and perfect will
Our wisdom is foolishness, our strength alone will fail
Though You’re still a mystery of one thing we are sure
You’re good and we turn to You, surrendering our all

We run to You, we run to You
God no one else will do, we run to you


Tonight the lesson for our church's women's Bible study was titled "Listening for the Music". After such a rough couple of weeks trying to keep my head above water running the homes, it was perfect to review the story of Peter walking on water with Jesus in Matthew 14:22-31.

Peter asked Jesus to say "come". I wonder if Peter expected what followed? Jesus said simply: "Come". (Similarly, I welcomed Jesus to call me to the field of the fatherless.)

When Peter realized, "Hey, this is nuts! the waves are HUGE! I'm gonna die!" his faithlessness threatened to sink him. (Somedays I wonder why in the world I wanted such a big job.)

But THEN when Peter called out "Lord, save me", Jesus immediately reached out His hand and rescued him. (Glad He doesn't get tired of me calling.)

Then the lesson ends with "Don't wait for the storm to pass before you sing. Don't wait for just the right situation in life before you let your spirit loose to dance. You can dance in the dark or when the storm rages. Lean fully on the Lord. Listen closely, and you'll hear His music in your spirit. Rely on Him for your every step, and you'll experience the joy and freedom of dependence." Amen! (The author has learned this lesson intimately--she is blind.)


Well that was a long post... I wrote it over a few days in spare minutes. Thanks for letting me process here! I don't care if anyone reads it or not, it's helpful for me. :-)

Here's praying that the next week is better........maybe with a chance to get all the babies out of the home to sterilize it top to bottom after these very sick weeks.

Baby Angel is really cute, still sleeping almost constantly. I got to hold him for several hours today after church, while we ate lunch in a serene outdoor restaurant on a perfect weather day.

In the afternoon we visited the cemetery. My Mom and sister had never been....they never had anyone to "visit" there until now.

A friend and former volunteer who works with street kids asked me today if we'd take in a 1 year old. A new child might help us heal. Or it might be too soon. A 2 year old was supposed to come soon anyway. Pray for God to make it clear which ones HE wants us to have!

Okay I'll really end this really long post now. Need to get myself organized before the week hits.